Do you feel like you haven’t achieved anything in life?
You think back, you look around, you compare, and you feel like what you’ve done isn’t good enough.
You may even look at the life you’re currently living and feel miserable, because you feel you should be doing something else, something greater.
Now, I could tell you to stop comparing, because it doesn’t help you. But you know that.
So instead of telling you what you already know, let’s dive below the surface.
What is Your Definition of Achievement?
When you feel like you haven’t achieved anything, what is it that you’re supposed to have achieved?
You see, we’re all run by how we view life. And how we view life is made up of our definitions, beliefs, and expectations.
And those definitions, beliefs, and expectations come from our genetics, personality, conditioning, friends, circumstances, and on the list goes.
It’s a whole slew of causes and conditions.
So let’s say you think you should be more successful. Maybe you’re an artist, and you don’t have wide recognition. But then, are you recognizing yourself? Are you putting yourself into your work fully and enjoying it?
Now, you may still have days when you feel low, when you feel like a failure. That’s normal. That’s called being human.
How to Deal with the Sense of Failure
Failure is a concept, it’s a thought.
What’s beneath is the sense of failure, which are sensations somewhere in the body.
These sensations are avoided at all cost, because they feel dangerous. What this avoidance usually looks like is that we go into thoughts.
Even the story ‘I’m not good enough’ is a welcome distraction from feeling what is in the body.
However, if you are willing to feel what’s in the body, without the label ‘failure’, you will discover that it can be done.
There’s nothing to be afraid of.
What is needed is to welcome the feeling and everything surrounding it. This means to embrace the resistance to it, the wanting it to go away, and the sensations themselves.
At first you may only be able to do this for a few seconds, but eventually as courage builds, you begin to defy your fears and feel into it even though it’s scary.
This is when a new world opens up, because you realize you don’t have to be afraid of feelings.
And what follows next is the realization that the sense of failure was just sensations in your body that needed to be heard, seen, and felt.
As the emotional charge lessens, you begin to feel freer, and life begins to move again.
Below is an older video of mine from 2016. In the video, I answer a question I received which complements this article, so click play, and keep reading below when you’re done.
We’re Not Here to Live Perfect Lives
When you stop putting so much pressure on yourself, life becomes more enjoyable. I’ve let go of most notions of success, because life brings me what is meant for me.
And I have to say, it’s a relief. There’s no need to work on myself, thinking I’ll get somewhere. No need to force success.
The more willing you are to simply feel, the more open you become to being present with what is, and that is what leads to enjoyment and peace.
It is not achievement and success that lead to happiness, but the realization of what and who you truly are.
You are an expression of life.
All the causes and conditions come alive in you and through you.
You are lived by life, you could say.
In other words, you don’t have to try so hard, or be so hard on yourself because you don’t live up to an image in your mind.
Let Go of the Imagined Life
Let it go. Live the life you have.
The only requirement is to meet what is here in this moment. Right now that may mean the feeling you’ve been avoiding for most of your life.
When you embrace what is in front of you, life opens up.
In the end, it comes down to simply living life. So what if your mind thinks you haven’t achieved anything?
It’s your monkey mind doing its dance. Look at how often your mind is wrong. Why give the images and thoughts in your head so much power?
This is life happening through you.
You’re here to stumble, and you’re here to fly.
Embrace the whole experience.
P.S. If you’d like to dive deeper into living a more enjoyable life, I suggest you check out my book: Follow Your Heart: 21 Days to a Happier, More Fulfilling Life.
Sign up to the free newsletter for exclusive articles, offers, and to make sure you never miss an update.