Hi,
I’m Henri.
From an early age, I was hooked by existential questions.
- Why am I here?
- Who am I?
- What is the correct path forward?
- How do I deal with anxiety and fear?
- Is life worth living?
- Should I follow my heart or my head?
- How do I stop suffering so much?
I never intended to teach what I knew. I stumbled into it.
What I knew seemed to help people, so I kept doing it. I was born and raised in Sweden by Finnish parents in a small town with a population of 10,000. I am a father of two, currently residing in Finland.
My journey started when I discovered lucid dreaming around 2002. From there, the path took me to meditation, personal development, and all the topics that come with that.
In 2011, I suddenly began wondering “Who am I? Who is the one that thinks?”
I didn’t think much of it. I was just curious. A few years later, I found myself in a dark night of the soul. Suddenly everything was meaningless and hopeless. I lost the will to do anything. Life seemed absurd. I didn’t have the energy to do much.
I went in and out of the dark night for next several years, and I wondered if it would ever stop, but stop it did. I resisted the anguish within me. I tried to run away, but eventually I surrendered to it all. I began to feel all the pain, fear, hopelessness, sadness and hurt.
That is when everything began to change.
This led to a sort of energetic shift, which some call kundalini, in 2018. A few years later, I began to wonder: Who is suffering? Who am I?
There was an exhaustion with running away, so I turned toward the anguish. There was suddenly complete determination to discover what was truly going on.
This culminated in a fundamental shift in identity in 2023. This is often called awakening, or stream entry in Buddhist circles.
It was suddenly obvious that life was just happening. There was no need to control anything, because it was always an illusion.
With this shift came a deep sense of relief, joy, and relaxation. Since life didn’t seem as personal, meeting emotions was much easier, and this willingness to meet whatever had been pushed down during my life led to a deep sense of equanimity, joy, and peace.
Even a few years ago, I did not think this was possible, yet here I am.
To continue reading my story, read this article.
If you’d like to explore Wake Up Cloud, check out the archives, browse my books, or sign up for a 1-on-1.
All the best,
Henri
P.S. I started Wake Up Cloud in 2009, which means that you will find a wide variety of articles from different stages of my own development.